life

[deralte]

I'm insanely stressed about my Phd apps right now. I'm not sleeping well, I'm clenching my jaw in my sleep and I've got massive headaches in the evenings. There are only two left to hear from, but unfortunately, they're the most important ones, and I could hear from them tomorrow or a month from now. I'd like the stress to be over now, please?

It doesn't help that I've got a kanji test on Thursday and a lesson test on Fri in Japanese. I wish the teacher would have had the sense to organize her schedule so we had lesson tests only on Tuesdays or Thursdays. Then we'd have at least two nights to study. I guarantee you that all our grades are lower when we have a major quiz, then a major test right after each other. I even had a dream this morning that she'd changed the time of the exams (you can always tell when I'm stressed cause I dream about normal things). I'm going to make up study sheets for them today, but it pisses me off that she's making this so hard on us for no reason at all. It doesn't help that she's a pretty cruddy teacher.

The bright spot of my week was finding out I got 100% on my Indian history midterm last night. (I had to cover my mouth to stop from laughing when the professor announced that it wasn't a good idea to get your answers from Wikipedia. The undergrads in this class continue to entertain me with their stupidity.)

Comments

[deralte.livejournal.com]

When I was younger, I trained myself to fall asleep with my tongue between my teeth so that I'd stop clenching my teeth while I slept. It generally seemed to work, but these days, I eventually just wake up in pain from biting my tongue and still get the jaw pain later from clenching too hard. *sigh* My only consolation is that I have to be seriously stressed to jaw clench so when my life is less stressful, I completely forget about it. Unfortunately, since my applications were submitted in Dec., I've been stressed for a very long time.

My future for the next year hinges on these applications so it's very hard to just relax and accept them as is, especially since so far all I've received are rejections (all but one were long shots so understandable, but scary). I hate being in limbo like this cause I can't even make basic decisions like how I'm spending my summer until I know what's in store for me at the end of it.

Thanks:)